top of page
  • Writer's pictureSchmaltz News

Store Bought Hamantashen Are Likely to End Up in the Trash

A new mishloach manot think tank has revealed that the vast majority of store bought hamantaschen land up in the trash before, during and after Purim.



Many kids were brought in to the think tank to verify these findings and more than one kid revealed, "yeh, if you get a store bought hamantash, the guy is clearly recycling the bad shalach monnis and keeping the good stuff for himself."


Think tank experts agree that home cooked real food like meat, kugels, cakes and dips were the creme de la creme but giving a store bought hamantash was like saying; "hey my garbage cans are full, why not put this in your garbage can".


Artisinal hamantash bakers were up in arms at the findings of the think tank and rightfully so.


"We make our hamantashen using the finest sourdough starter and prefer pulled kobe beef brisket as a filler than some of the goop in the regular store bought hamantashen".


The think tank dismissed these claims by saying that they were only surveying hamantashen that were under $25 dollars each.


Head of the think tank, Chaim Asachtzeit said that many store bought hamantashen make the diner feel that he is not only eating Haman's hat but he is also eating the wax from Haman's ears as the filler. "Who knows, perhaps that is what it means that they represent Haman's hat and Haman's ears."



110 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Young Boy sets of Middos Alert by Kissing the Mezuzah

A young boy in Brooklyn has set off a middos alert by kissing the mezuzah. Following the Chief Rabbi's ban on kissing the mezuzah, the re-programmed middos alert system is now going off every few seco

bottom of page