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Chinese: Chinese Auctions Not Ours

The Chinese Foreign Ministry has released a shocking report in which they state clearly that there is nothing Chinese about Chinese Auctions.

The report which was given to the press late Tuesday makes many attacks on Chinese Auctions and says that they are neither Chinese nor auctions. The report concluded that a Chinese Auction is simply an elegant way of saying a raffle.

Chinese Foreign Minister Wang Yi echoed the sentiment of the report and said "What is chinese about placing your name on a ticket for a particular item, seems like a raffle to me". Yi went on to say "Most of these events don't even serve Chinese food, if they were serving Chinese food then a Chinese Raffle would be a good name but most of them serve Sushi and the like, they should call it a Japanese Raffle and if they serve Pizza it should be an Italian Raffle, it seems ridiculous that any non-profit Jewish raffle for a long list of items should be called a Chinese Auction."

Asked whether China intends on taking any action against organizations that continue to use the term Chinese Auction, Yi said that no decision has been made for now but there was the possibility of some sort of action in the future.

Organizations were just waking up to the news on Tuesday in America and many were shocked. Spokesman for the Federation of Jewish Non-Profits in the USA, Shlomo Steinbeck said that for forever and a day people have been referring to it as Chinese Auctions. If China does press further with the matter we will simply re-brand them as Chai Knees Auctions. "Chai is very representative of Jewish giving and knees are important too, so it won't be so bad if they are called Chai Knees Auctions", Steinbeck concluded.

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