July 11, 2017

A Jewish orthodox lady has revealed to her friends in what was a very difficult announcement  that she ran a marathon. It is the same lady that has a difficult time sharing with others that she is vegan and has experimented with cross-fit.

While sitting among a group of...

July 3, 2017

In overnight breaking news, Schmaltz News has learned that a Brooklyn man was about to copy a Jewish DVD when he saw the "against Halacha" warning on the cover and decided to stop. 

At around about midnight the man sat down at his computer to copy the DVDs. He initially...

June 30, 2017

With the three weeks around the corner, many Jews around the world prepare to mark this mourning period with no music and other restrictions. It will then comes as news that a rabbinic authority, who advises Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump has given a specific heter for...

June 26, 2017

Schmaltz News has learned that KMR has teamed with Richard Branson and Virgin Galactic to offer an outer space Pesach experience. The up side of this incredible endeavor is that due to halachic ramifications on space travel Pesach will last all of 8 minutes. The down s...

June 18, 2017

A congregant who is remaining anonymous to protect his identity has admitted to sending his shul's weekly e-mail to spam. He explained that if it was actually a weekly e-mail, it would probably not have been sent to spam but it is becoming more like a daily e-mail.


June 15, 2017

A New York father of six discovered a previously thought to be lost for all eternity seat in the backseat of his mini-van. 

The 46 year old father stumbled across the seat when his son alerted him that under the pile of many things sitting on the booster seat, there is...

June 14, 2017

The Schmlatz has discovered evidence of a confused man who spelled shabbos with an "i" as in Shabbis.

The grave error was discovered when sending a text to his wife. The full length of the text read "Are we inviting guests for Shabbis?"

People on the street who heard of...

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© 2017 by The Schmaltz